Dear Jonah

Tonight we watched some old youtube videos that Dad posted a few years ago.  You were a basically a baby, only one year old in a few of them, and the oldest clip was posted when you were barely five years old.  At one point when we were watching for the third time a Mother's Day video from 2011 that we sent to both Grandma Hill and Grandma Harris, you said you didn't want to watch it again and you went upstairs in tears.  I followed you up because I was so confused as to why watching this old video made you upset... especially since we'd already watched it twice before.  You refused to tell me despite my gentle pleas.  I convinced you to come down so we could watch one more that you hadn't seen yet. You were fine until I mentioned how fun it was to see you at three years old talking about your "cow-cow" blanket, and then your lip started quivering and I knew I had touched that place in your heart that was aching - even though I was still unsure what, exactly, you were feeling.

After that, at bedtime, we snugged and read in my bed but I wanted to make sure you were alright and I also wanted to make sure I knew why you were upset.  When I asked if you wanted to talk about what made you sad, you just started to cry again and then when I asked if you just missed being so little,  you nodded your head with tears streaming down your face.  That was it: you simply missed being that little boy who said and did funny things, who played with toys that have long since been packed away in the attic, whose voice was so different, so small, whose face was cherubically round and whose eyes had not yet decided on a final color.  I was not surprised to learn this, as you are my only child who deeply cherishes what surrounds you in your seven year old world.  You often talk about your possessions with thoughts of the future.  You tell me that I can't send things to the thrift store because you want to have them for your little boys (you don't want daughters right now...that may change).  You talk about the future and how you want to give your children these same experiences that you have had as a child. Nothing, absolutely nothing means more to me than knowing that your life thus far has been filled with so much joy that your heart aches to see the past as you watch your own self growing up.

I love you so very much Jonah and I promise you that there will be more times in your life when you are able to look back and miss what is gone to the world of memories...a sure sign of a life well lived.

Here you are at 4 years old:

General Conference

I love the Fall session of General Conference.  I love that the weather has cooled down a bit, that there is little to no humidity, and that the leaves are changing colors and when I look out any of my windows I watch them falling like rain with the gentlest of winds.  I also love some of the traditions we have around conference that have evolved over time, including hiking in Mint Springs on Sunday morning, coloring mosaics while listening to the speakers (I find it's a great tactic to stay engaged), having Navajo tacos on Saturday night and Stromboli on Sunday.  But the best part of the whole weekend is gathering around the t.v. together to listen to the Prophet and Apostles inspire us to become better people each and every day. Unfortunately, Jared has missed both 2013 sessions because of academic conference commitments, so these are all the photos I texted him over the weekend to help him feel a little closer to home.

Saturday after soccer games were wrapped up we headed in for long overdue haircuts before catching the 4:00 session of conference. Gavin and Liam are hidden behind their two hairdressers in the background.

 Mosiacs

More doodling

Indian Fry Bread for Navajo Tacos with TVP

Caleb left for the evening Priesthood session and the rest of us played a rousing game of Quirkle where for the first time Gavin and I didn't come in 1st and 2nd places.  In fact, Liam set a new family record of getting 6 Quirkles in a row and 8 total over the course of the game!

Resting after the first half mile of uphill climbing in Mint Springs.  Jonah carried the map the entire hike.

Gavin was leading out and decided that he wanted to venture up to this impressive power lines tower or whatever you call that thing.

Jonah figuring out where we were and where we were going.

Gavin, as usual, was the leader of our pack and he kept a pace I had to try to keep up with.  The others were not interested in taking the extra .5 mile section that he and I wanted to explore, so we parted ways.  I love hiking with Gavin....he never complains and like me ends up wanting to push a little further because we just want to see what's around that next bend in the path.  Here is a selfie of the two of us.

I couldn't get a clear shot of all the mosaics with my phone, so this will have to do.

Jared is en route back home and the stromboli is about to be consumed as soon as the boys come down after showering and cleaning up.  I can hear Liam blowdrying his hair....this is a new fascination of his and frankly his hair looks great when he gives it that extra touch! The only other male person in the world who I know blow dries their hair every day is Uncle James, who Liam James is in part named after.......

Camping

This past weekend we got to enjoy a 3 day break from school and being that our normal weeks don't end until Caleb finishes up with cello on Friday night at 7:15, I was beyond excited.  I think Jared and I shared a collective sigh when C. and I arrived home after 7:30 that night.  Jared had the brilliant idea to go camping after church on Sunday!  Perfect!  So after a Saturday full to the brim with soccer and Sunday's normal church services, we came home and I threw in some lasagna to eat before departing while Jared packed us up.  We headed to Loft Mountain where we camped last August, and which sits along the Shenandoah Parkway about 60 minutes or less from our front door.  We drove along the roads looking for the very spot we camped last year only to find it was taken, so we ventured down a few more roads scouting out the different sites until we found F135 and pitched the tents.  We have the huge family tent that can sleep 6 comfortably, but Caleb wanted to bring his own tent he recently purchased, so he put that one up for himself and Gavin.  Ruby was along for the adventure and joined us in the tent on her sleeping rug because dog hair makes me crazy and I didn't want her sleeping next to or with anyone.  

After the tents were pitched we snacked on roasted red pepper hummus I made with Liam before leaving and which was voted by 3 of us to be better than Sticks kebob shop in town. Afterwards it was time for marshmallow roasting.  A few caught on fire and Jonah was frustrated with all of his that kept burning.  Gavin would always offer his up to help out the situation......thanks Gavin.  Caleb was the most patient and mastered the roasting, presenting us with a nicely golden delight that he smooshed between two graham crackers.  There was no chocolate, because I forgot to buy some.

This first picture is the only one snapped at night time and the rest are from the the following morning:

When I finally decided to get out of my cozy new lightweight sleeping bag Jared bought, I kept hearing them call to Ruby over and over, which was starting to get annoying.  So when I came out I discovered that Ruby was gone and no one was looking for her because they said, in a very unconcerned tone, that she would come back at some point!  So I got in the car to go look for her, knowing full well she would not be making her way back because she loves people and she had no identification tags on her collar.  In fact, when I finally figured out that she was with the camp host thanks to another camper out walking her dog, she and her husband told me that in the 45 minutes that they had her they decided that if someone didn't claim her they were planning on keeping her.  The husband even described how he just sat and held her and she snuggled right into him......here I am searching for her leash while the host is taking down our information and gently reminding me that the Park Ranger is not so forgiving of pets not on a leash.  

I'd keep her too if I found her wandering in the woods with no tags!  We all love this girl!

We broke down camp and headed for Chimney Rocks for our 3.5 mile hike.  

Like all self-timed photos this one was painful.  The boys know how to push Jared's buttons when it comes to taking group photos and this one was no exception, but I'm glad we persevered and have it for the record! Caleb is standing on a rock looking tall, but in reality he IS taller than me by almost 2 inches and his shoe size is bigger than Jared's.

This is my favorite picture from the trip.  I love to see them in order of age with Caleb leading the pack and Jonah happy to bring up the rear.  

On top of Chimney Rocks with the Shenandoah Valley in the background.

Stopping for lunch.  Caleb refuses to ever wear his hat so the brim shades his face and asked if he could sunscreen his face and cover his neck!  Jared didn't go for that...so he sun screened both face and neck and wore his hat however he wanted.

This photo was the most painful for all of us on the entire trip.  Jared was losing patience with the boys antics, we were sitting on the edge of a ledge with 30+ foot drop and at one point a huge spider came out of no where and nearly landed on Gavin which of course made us all scream and jump up out of position. And then in the end the best shot, Jonah's eyes are closed! His smile is fantastic though...

Poor Jonah, he's trying so hard to smile through the tears after deliberately messing up yet another shot:) Oh the joys of family photos!

We made it back in time to unpack, eat leftovers, send Caleb and Liam to orchestra and give everyone a well deserved shower before climbing in bed to start the week the next morning.